Relationship Charter

Similar to team charters, a Relationship Charter outlines shared goals and norms two people agree to live by to increase peace and ease as a couple. Check out Sami and Benjamin’s first relationship charter from 2015 when they started dating.

Goals

  1. Provide love and support to one another. 

  2. Encourage each other to grow personally and professionally. 

  3. Cuddle. 

Personality Types

Girlfriend: 

Personality Assessment: ENTJ

Enneagram: The Achiever

Boyfriend: 

Personality Assessment: ESFP 

Enneagram: The Challenger

Love Languages (in order of preference) 

Girlfriend 

  1. Affirmation- compliments are great. 

  2. Affection- head rubs preferred

  3. Quality Time- even if there is nothing to do, doing nothing together is special. 

  4. Acts of Kindness- hiding Twix bars is the preferred act of kindness. 

  5. Gifts- random gifts are appreciated when you see something that makes you think of her, but there is no obligation for gifts. Written cards and notes are nice. 

Boyfriend 

  1. Affection - the more touching the better.  unless he’s working.

  2. Acts of Kindness - cooking, networking on his behalf, creative problem solving.

  3. Quality Time - taking long walks, talking about life and watching netflix.

  4. Affirmation - Hearing compliments second hand is always the best.

  5. Gifts- No tangible objects.  Just food, activities and services.


Terms

  1. Samjamin agrees to practice open communication at all costs.

  2. Girlfriend agrees to not refer to Boyfriend as ‘babe’. 

  3. It’s preferred to begin phone conversations before 11pm CT/9pm PT

  4. Both parties agree to put effort into their appearance. 

  5. Samjamin will meet with a couples counselor at least once a year.  

  6. Samjamin will grow from conflict by using the happiness scale and go with a net positive approach. 

  7. BF agrees not to prank GF’s family. 

  8. GF needs at least one night of doing nothing during the workweek. 

  9. GF agrees to clear her work space when her work period is over. 

  10. Samjamin will celebrate our relationship through dancing, dinner, relaxing, or cuddling. (i.e. anything we feel like doing at that time) 

  11. If apart, Samjamin will communicate at least once a day through email or phone, except if out of the country. 

Enforcement Mechanisms: 

  • When Girlfriend is in breach of contract, she will treat boyfriend to a restaurant of his choice. 

  • When Boyfriend is in breach of contract, he will give Girlfriend a 30 minute massage or buy her a 60 minute massage.